I’m Not Sorry

 

 

First off, Happy Birthday to an absolute queen. I think about Demi almost everyday. I hope she is doing alright, and getting the care she needs to recover. The talent, passion, and creativity behind her is a force to be reckon with. Her overdose hit home hard for me. I kept up with all the articles and blurbs about her story hoping that she would be strong enough to overcome this relapse. I wish nothing but the best to an absolute icon. Get better we are rooting for you.

Addiction is so real, it ruins relationships, affects your work, and changes your capacity to live a decent sober life. These days I think about fellow school mates I went to high school with or grew up with that that are no longer with us. It pains me to believe that regular young adults I shared class with, or a Friday night at the fair don’t breathe the same air as me anymore. I feel like we lose someone about every six months. Every six months someone pushes the limit a little too much and pays for it with their life. How do we tell the ones we love to take comfort in sobriety when the only thing keeping them alive is a substance.

I would like to disclose that I have never used any drugs. I’ve never smoked a cigarette, or taken a hit. Matter of fact, in 2016 I found out that I was allergic to codine from my wisdom tooth extraction which was rather unpleasant. So thank god I didn’t rebel in high school and get high behind the football field. I wanted to state that I am drug free not because I’m proud, or above it, but because I have no idea what it does to someone other than what I can evaluate as a third party. I know that I don’t like that my loved ones are apart of this fad, that it’s an expensive hobby, and  that you don’t know when too much is too much until it’s too late.

My struggle among many others, I can imagine, is that how do we (sober friends or family) sit by and allow it time and time again when we know that it isn’t a matter of “if” there is a limit but “when.”

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